Things I am grateful for…

Okay, so, I’ve not been exactly sarcastic in recent times…I must have lost some of it when throwing up in those past months. And now I have a list of things I am grateful for?

Waitaminute. Whose blog are you looking for anyway?

Nope. This is NOT a nice, lovey-dovey, coo-ing, gushy, mushy, sickly sweet mommy blog. No WAY. When I first started blogging, I intend to be a real snarky bitch. Not some nice, sweet, blogging mommy who will gush over how sweet, how nice, how innocent (uggggh…can someone pass me the bucket to throw up in now?), how whatever my babies are.

Puh-lez.

So, without much ado, these are what I am SO entirely grateful for nowadays…

1. I am grateful that I am not being evicted from some church grounds or that I even live on church grounds

2. I am grateful that I was not a model (especially a Mongolian one) who happened to rub shoulders with the wrong sorts of people

3. I am grateful that I am not a high profile blogger who has to be on the run because the government could not accept what I blogged about even if it’s the truth

4. I am grateful that I am not the narrow minded censors who’d even black out breastfeeding pictures on magazines as if that is SO pornographic or something

5. I am grateful that I am also not the TV censors who thinks the word ‘penis’ is obscene and equivalent to blardy effing swear words

6. I am grateful that I do not indulge in kinky totally weird-out sex that involved ropes and asphyxiation

7. I am grateful that I don’t look old enough to be mistaken as my son’s grandmother

8. I am grateful that I am getting charged sky high for local produce or else I may probably need to pay equally sky high for imported products

9. I am grateful that I don’t need to pay the exhorbitant prices of LOCALLY MADE cars with POOR, SUB-STANDARD quality as I have a dependable decades old imported car that runs smoother and consumes less petrol than the sub-standard local car

10. I am grateful that there are a lot of dums-dums in government whose brain cells are less than those on an ape as this means I am not one of them

11. I am grateful I am not in Perak with all the messy political situation there which could have been easily resolved but weren’t

12. I am grateful I still throw up on occasion as this means I am eating something to be able to throw up something

13. I am grateful that my brothers are all alive and well although they are driving my dad up the wall most of the time

14. I am grateful that I don’t have to deal with demons although there are loads of humans who are much worse than demons

15. I am grateful I am not the one who blundered in the whole USM fiasco

16. I am grateful that I stay in such a wonderful country where racism is legally sanctioned and education / business opportunities given based on skin colour and not merit

17. I am grateful that costs of living here is so unaffordable as this means I will be able to appreciate that my hard earned money are meant to be spent to line the pockets of those who only shake legs and have political connections

18. I am grateful that I am able to walk around feeling so unsafe and be worried about snatch thefts, rapists, murderers, robbers, etc as it keeps my mind alert and me paranoid

19. I am grateful that I have nice life compared to the lives of the indigenous people who were sidelined, forgotten, their citizenship questioned and their lands taken from them even though their family lineage here dates back thousands of years

20. I am grateful that I still believe in God despite the cruelties of humans against animals and humans themselves.

So, there. A lot of things to be grateful for, don’t you think so?

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